Work keeps getting in the way of life, so I think to myself: am I trying to get fired?
I'm still wrapping things up from poetry week. I had one more round of Prairie-Chicken that came in last night and went out this morning. I've got one more draft of the book proposal for Voces. Need to do edits for this year's Voces anthology. Edits for Route Words. Oh yeah, and I need to plan the class I'm teaching that starts Tuesday.
The thing that keeps coming up for me is the itch to do something bigger. To structure my working life so that all these side projects are my job. How does one do that? I know I have the charisma and competence. But there's such fear! I'd much prefer to stumble upon something close to what Shelle has -- a steady job with paid vacation days and the ability to work on 5 programs a year -- all of her own choosing.
If I keep adding projects here and projects there, will I eventually not need a day job? My real plan is to try to get my day job to pay for some more facilitation training. I think that would be the best. I think that would be a steady-ish source of work.
But can I really face the rest of my life as a contractor, just like my mom trying to be a real estate agent and worrying about money every day of her life? The very thought is exhausting to me.
But this 4 job at a time thing is killing me. I can feel it. I won't be able to do it much longer. So what's a girl to do?
1) Finish her thesis
2) Get more facilitation training
3) Get more contacts
4) Save money
5) Strike out on her own when the time is right.
Until then, duty calls...