January 2000
I.
Brown grows between my legs --
I am no longer a mother.
Self can be constructed deconstructed --
I can create and destroy.
Chicago makes magic blue and fluid like michigan's lake
black and red like that day
like that hole
like that blood not my blood
blood no longer my blood
blood no longer blood
Until the day I no longer bleed.
I am still bleeding.
II.
White catches brown --
I am free.
Time can be taken given --
What they took I am given.
Chicago gives life on a day white covers streets like sheets
like ice packs
takes life in a wash of sweat
a swirl of brown and red
takes a life not my life
gives life no longer my life
Until the day I move on.
I am not moving.
III.
Blood red moon over gold --
I am an aunt not a mother.
Being separate I am alone not alone --
Distance and time makes me free.
Chicago fills the spirit with gold moon fire
(gold light ripples on black)
empties the body of unrecognized souls
(blood red moon over gold --
we are free
you are me
not me
you will never be
me
never be without me
you can never be free)
ensconces the self among bodies friends
carries in the winds the sounds of home
lifts my spirit wrapped in wind
and takes me home
carries me home
plunges me home in the dark, cold waters where it all began
where all life began
where everything begins
Until the day it begins for me.
It has already begun.
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